Travel

Travel sucks even more when PCPing...I can already see the whole meal plan for today falling into complete disarray. So far have managed to stick to the diet and routine to the last gram, I know tonight will b a struggle so keeping my treat joker up my sleeve as I know I will be calling on indulgence no.1. not sure if in the form of 2 glasses of wine (Patrick did not specify how full or big the glass was to be, teehee) or something savoury. Truth is I don't crave anything that much, but will be a big social occasion for me with loads ofpeople I have not seen for ages and to commemorate Andy's life (my recently deceased friend) so dealing with emotions and peer pressure will be a bigger issue than any repressed food cravings. Looks like time to catch the plane soon. Will stock up on a couple of apples from the lounge to take on board the plane. And I always wondered who is the idiot who eats the apples and plain salad in the business lounge when you can have the curry, croissants or ice-cream!

Treats

Still keeping the ace up my sleeve. Truth is as oddly as it sounds, that I do not desperately crave any particular food, more so the spontaneity of the here and now, having the flexibility to go meet soem friends and have a taps nibble with a glass of wine: Guess Spanish rosquillas (essentially a type of donuts) dunk in milk is one of the things I miss the most, but when I think about how it feels after eating a few of them, then much of eating them disappears. Either way as I am due in London later in the week for my friends´ funeral and some business meetings that I have tagged along I deliberately have left my treat allowance to use when there. There will be undoubtedly a lot of food and drink-based mourning, as is socially customary in this cases, and I would like to part take in some of it without imposing too much in terms of constraints when out for dinner etc. I have to say that I am not particularly looking forward to all the disruptions that travel and social gatherings bring about in terms of breaking my well scheduled routine. PCP is so much easier in a well controlled and regimented routine, with little in terms of temptations or disruptions to eating hours etc. But I guess is a bit like enlightenment...anyone can achieve "special" states of mindfulness being a hermit away from distractions and external influence, but what is the point if do not make you functional amidst the realities and turmoil of "real life". I guess this is the same, int eh sense that you cannot live forever in a PCP world, the human being is a social animal, and in order to extend the PCP benefits beyond the 90 days of the programme, we need to make the PCP principles work in a social context that involves overating, overdrinking as part of our somewhat disfunctional social interactions...even so, I wish i did not have to travel to London, as PCP on the road is always so much more difficult, and also will have to miss on one of the highlights of Heathrow terminal 5: loading up on the creamy chicken found in the BA lounge as I wait for my flight to depart....
I guess a little bit of a catch up in workout progress is due...
1) Resistance Bands. THE GOOD: I had found that the max strangth bank in the set of 3 that I bought was not strong enough. Luckily I have figured out that you can hook 2 together, adding to extra resistance and this combined with virtually no rest between sets, and extra focus on the negative part of the movements (releasing the tension ever so slowly in a controlled fashion rather than simply letting go of the band after the point of maximum stretch has been reached) works fantastically well giving me a decent muscle burn
THE BAD: have already snapped or broken 2 bands...at this rate this could be a very expensive PCP
2) Workouts: lunges are the biggest killers, but all in all thus far not as tough as I expected
3) Diet. So far surprisingly much easier than I thought. PCP discipline is exactly what I needed as on my own I would not have had enough motivation or will power to sustain teh diet required to reach the dramatic physical changes into peak condition given the horrible physical state that I managed to get myself into. How many months of living in denial and lying to myself that "I am not that fat", or " I can start tomorrow and get really serious about working out and eating well, but for today, given all the stress of work I am entitled an extra indulgence..."
4) Time: this is the most difficult variable. Many concessions have had to be made at many levels. Taken zazen time, reading time, etc away from me. pretty much what I do at the moment is work and PCP, not room for much else in my life, which is hard to accept. But I do sense that it will all be for a good reason as the physical and mental improvement that will follow PCP completion will carry on to all areas of my life. is just hard to accept that there is not much more at the moment to life than work and PCP, just feels quite shallow and single dimensional. I even feel most importantly that the time and though that I allocate to my loved ones (and most importantly my wife) has gone down substantially and that this has become a bit of an egotistic quest. A thought that I find somehow troubling and at odds with my inner moral convictions.

Impermanence and motivation

I was reading Patrick's post this am, where he mentions the hurdles and obstacles that some other people might throw into our PCP path. Last weekend an old friend died unexpectedly. One of those untimely deaths that makes good the old rhetoric question of "why does it always have to happen to the good guys?" ring full of meaning. And truth is,could not have happened to a nicer fella. Furthermore, he was very fit guy, ran half marathons once a month, played soccer every week with his team...he passed away after just crossing the finish line in a half a marathon run, heart failure induced by asthma attack apparently....and of all the people I know, many of which treat their bodies with utter contempt, if not sheer recklessness, had to be good old Andy to die. He s only 39 and leaves behind 3 kids ages, 10, 6, 3. This got me thinking a lot about the Buddhist conceptwa of impermanence and whether there is a purpouse in doing much at all. I know well that this nihilistic approach is not the essence of what the Buddha preached, but wonder how many of our efforts are misguided and futile. What part of PCPing is a healthy attempt at establishing a mindful awareness of our bodies and making them more functional for a "healthy" understanding of life and a genuinely richer experience, but how much of it is a boost to the ego based on preconceived ideas of how I should look in order to get social or sexual admiration. Despite all these nihilistic reflections on the futility of our efforts in the transient "world of form", have to say that I am starting to feel a good number of positive PCP effects. Although less consistent (as have had to give up some of the morning time pre-work to PCP workouts and meal preparations) my zazen has got so much better. I know that zazen is one of those things that you are not suppose to label, as good/bad, successful/unsuccessful, pleasant/unpleasant, zazen just is....But I have to say that my lotus posture has felt the strongest it has been in a while and all teh sittings have been unusually comfortable, more comfortable that just lying on the sofa!! i guess that I am also following religiously Patrick´s own recommendations (there is a great video by him on youTube on getting your full lotus better) and been incorporating wide angle forward bends after all my PCP workout. For all of you interested in zen, yoga or just being more flexible/functional this video is a must...here is the link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USAeDzIbM5M

LOVE SUNDAYS

Jumps done...lost count and ended up doing 970...breakfasts felt well deserved after finding the energy to get out of bed despite the cold. Actually the small card induced by jumping seems to have helped clear the sinuses, now back to bed!! God I do love Sundays!! Still lunges to do this eve though...

SICK

Not enough sleep for recovery, stress, and extra activity on top of PCP workouts seems to have taken it's toll so managed to develope a prett bad ass cold, which has aggravated my somewhat worn out state. Had some early warning symptoms on Tuesday after a very active aikido session. My activity levels seem to have gone up quite a bit thIs week, and even the toll of little things like filling in a back pack with kilos of fresh fruit and walking from a distant supermarket instead of ordering online or a little bit of swimming after the workouts to relax the muscles and add some card might have well been too much for my vody. The flip side of all that is that despite the tiredness and ultimately being ill, I have managed to stick to PCP 100%. and the results already starting to come through helps on the motivational side of things. Noticeable weight loss, some vascularity and definition returning to some areas of the body are all encouraging, and for just a couple of weeks the changes feel remarkable. Fair to say that the muscles although leaner feel flat and a bit devoid of life, but guess that is normal with the low carbs intake, which is working miracles anyways, so guess will not give it much thought. Im not sure how to play things out now. Have cheated somehow yesterday amid sneezes, sore throat and weakness, and to the fruit snacks I added a 4 oranges home squeezed which I offset by adjusting slightly down the weight intake of the last snack, yet still technically exceeding my allowance by a fair amount. Anyways I am typing this in bed wondering how to approach the day from a PCP perspective. Luckily falling ill over the weekend allows one to exert more control over rests, food and workout times. So will plan to stay as much of the day needed slacking around watching films or in bad until I find the energy for the workout. And damn, it had to be lunges day today!!!!

IT IS ALL RELATIVE....

Today is the first difficult day I have encountered thus far. And is not about the workout routine (so far, lunges aside, all deceptively easy), or the diet which I am actually quite enjoying and somehow is giving me a more steady supply of energy instead of intermittent short-lived sugar rushes that had grown accustomed to of late. It is about the difficulty of balancing a particularly difficult and critical time at work, and lack of time with many of the anal demands of the program. Is bad enough having little time for oneself and to relax from work, but have had to give up some of the zazen time in the morning, and some leisure and pure relaxation after the particularly high levels of stress of the job at the moment to prepare meals, weigh items, take pictures, write this blog...it is a concession that I am struggling to accept. I can sense the benefits in the not so distant future when I finally see some progress in my physical condition, but at the moment is all hard to accept. As personal admin piles up, repairs and DIY around the house builds up into a soon to be insurmountable backlog, and domestic chores loom more threatening in the absence of my wife I am finding harder to accept the commitment and compromise. Only the thought, image and feeling of a fitter me seems to bring some of the needed motivation, but feels too distant in time. On the other hand, the thought of the difficulties, fear, emotional stress, and loss sustained by those affected one way or another by the Japan earthquake and tsunami makes me ashamed of the pettiness of my complaints. It is all relative after all, and whenever we think we have it bad, there is someone who is in a worse predicament and who finds a way to sustain adversity. My thoughts are right now with those of you who are in Japan. Is hard enough to accept the sad tragedy of recent events, and seeing your lives disrupted at so many levels, to find the motivation and will to complete PCP. There is a lesson in seeing the most basic comforts and security that we have grown accustomed to take for granted in our developed world, and in the ephemeral and transient nature of life, and yet must be a hard task to reconcile some of these lofty thoughts with completing PCP. Yet i suppose that some of the same spirit of sacrifice and determination in pursuit of a future goal is what will help Japan bounce back from this as ti did from the horrific aftermath of WWII, and in creating these will and stamina, the PCP discipline can help in establishing the foundations. I somehow finish this post feeling that I have it really easy, and that PCP should be a breeze....Yes all is relative after all. 

P.S. Patrick, thanks for your dedication and keeping PCP running despite all the potential constraints and set backs: I really appreciate the double effort that will go into your posts and updates in the next few weeks. 

THIS TIME IS FOR REAL...

The first week has been quite good, energy levels are up from regular activity and I have developed a "healthy addiction" to skipping...I had tried many forms of physical exercise in the morning after my usual zazen session, but I found all of them either inconvenient or too harsh on my still half asleep body. I had never been an early bird in terms of exercising at the peak of my fitness levels many moons ago when still a student, even less now with less hours of rest. Recently I had tried swimming as a form of gentle morning exercise, and even though there is a pool in my building was hard to give it continuity, and ended up taking way too much time. Skipping (which unlike most people I had never done before even as a kid) is convenient, you can do it just about anywhere, and takes no preparations...What a brilliant idea!!...I had started pre-skipping ahead of the official beginning of PCP (at the recommendation of my PCP-veteran wife Louise) and I can already feel some of the benefits...I went snowboarding with some friends 2 weekends ago, and I already enjoyed more stamina and to some degree more coordination. Also skipping seems to have accelerated my weight loss already, also helped by being more mindful about what I eat. Now that the real thing starts I kind of regret not having gone with half of my normal food for this week. I have to confess that I "cheated somehow" and preferred to transition to "healthier" diet propositions like more veggies, complex carbs instead of sugars etc. I guess that comes from my "all or nothing" personality, so I either eat junk or I eat none. Find the "middle-way" somewhat difficult I guess, so much for a practicing buddhist!! But somehow with the whole beginning of PCP on my mind there was no room or appetite for greasy or oversugary foods... Have to say that I feel a lot better, but somehow I sense that I will regret this unnecessary "strictness", as the "real diet" begins, so might have to treat myself to half a cheesy pizza tonight...Bye bye donuts...my dear friends I will be missing you. I am excited to begin the whole thing "for real" , yet at the same time I probably could not have chosen a worse week, which will involve some critical meetings for my business (some of which will undoubtedly involve copious meals and a very alcoholic night out to seal a potentially very important deal) and also travelling to London for a weekend, thus testing the portability of the workouts whilst staying in hotel rooms, and the ability to concoct PCP compliant meals whilst on-the-go.

DAY 3

As I woke up this morning still tired from a fairly intense aikido session on Tuesday night, getting out of bed felt like a hard thing to do. But oddly not so much from current tirenedness, or as a result of the temptation to skip my 30mins morning zazen in order to get a bit of extra rest ahead of the morning PCP workout, but from fast forwarding and thinking, how will I cope with this 1 month down the line, when the workout is not a "Mickey Mouse" one and when the diet becomes more restrictive? I dont want to compromise my morning zen practice, which gives structure to the day, but I know I will feel increasingly tired. In my days of serious and gruelling gym workouts I used to give myself the benefit of 10hrs of sleep to avoid overtraining and help muscles recover and "grow", but then I was at university, living the careless life of a student with no commitments in my life. Now, with 6 or 7 hours of sleep if I am lucky, this is going to be tougher. As longer workouts, extra meal planning/cooking time, and increased need for rest loom ahead I feel I need to start replanning around the little available spare time that I have...It will be hard alone giving up bad food and other "unhealthy" habits to also reduce the amount of zazen, aikido, sleep or more importantly quality time with my wife; all of the things that make long and hard work hours more bearable...